So as the semester comes to a close, I have seen some of my closest friends freak out over some classes as they get ready to graduate this year. I freaked out about classes too, but I will not be joining them down at the ceremony.
It's starting to hit that I am not graduating this year - its a known fact, not a surprise. But many of my friends I graduated high school with four years ago are completing college. They get to enter the real world. Granted, I am not ready for the "real world" - whatever that may be for me. I know that my future looks good and bad at the same time. I will be pursuing something that is so underground and uncertain I probably will have problems at some point with finding a job, but so will everyone.
But it comes with this change as these friends graduate that people change. A lot of things have changed in the past years. Friends, bands, girls, guys, even my likes and dislikes in music. I took some time the other day to look at a bunch of my Facebook photos from the beginning of being tagged until now. And that is just the beginning, I have thousands more pictures on my computer.
It's interesting to see where I have come from, but the problem is I don't know where I am going.
I have been all over the place, trying to be several different places at once. That doesn't work anymore. It's time to settle down. But I haven't found anything I am comfortable with. It's something I have been missing for a long time. And I have searched high and low but have yet to find something that feels right.
I think this summer will have an interesting effect on me. It will, in a way, keep my mind off things. But that van freetime will certainly take its toll.
But regardless, I will keep searching.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
maybe u will figure out where ur supposed to be this summer. maybe that will be with me. maybe we'll get married. maybe we'll have kids. maybe. maybe. maybe.
Post a Comment